2001-10-07 01:56:36 (UTC)


well.. hmmm....... lets see how long this new hobby lasts
eh? never been much for these things, but i
figured "hey, why not".. besides. i'm bored.

ok. well. i'm home in nj right now.. normally would be at
college in va, but it's midsemester break. i had back to
the horror known as midterms on tuesday.. goodie..

for some insane reason i decided to declare as a Govt Admin
major -- a writing intensive major that the university is
in the process of eliminating.. i'm taking junior year
courses (because they won't be offered again) when i
haven't even started the prerequisites yet... its pretty
darn hard, and i'm in over my head. it wouldn't be too bad
if i planned on receiving a degree for all this work, but i
realized a lil too late that i don't want to receive a
BSGA... in fact, i don't think i'll even try for a
degree.. guess that makes me sound like a slacker.... i
plan on taking a few business courses, maybe a few culinary
courses.. and then i'm going to try to get an
unofficial "apprenticeship" at a local tavern.. in case you
haven't figure it out yet, i want to open my own
bar/tavern. surprise surprise.

anyway. yeah. so for those who know me.. you know i'm
undertaking the feat of growing my hair out... for those
who don't know me (which, btw, why are you reading this?),
i've extremely short hair that is usually spiky and
outrageously dyed... but, the nice person inside of me has
decided to grow my hair and then donate it to kids w/cancer
(for wigs)... so not only is my hair longer than i like,
but its a natural color -- kinda... i had dyed my hair a
brown color, not quite as dark as my natural tho, a month
ago... it has faded w/a greenish tint, so i decided to try
dying it again tonight... the box said it was "dark
expresso brown".. well.. they lied.... either that or i
goofed somehow.. my hair is a kinda purply color. i'm not
too happy with the situation. it looks alright.. but i've
been trying to match my roots... i wanted this to be the
last time i dye it until i get to chop the stuff off.. now
i've to do it at least one more time.. maybe i'll actually
pay to have it done.....

the next few weeks at school are going to prove to be
insane.... i've midterms this week and next.. in addition
next week is "family week" and the week following that
is "homecoming/spirit week"... so the campus is going to
be packed w/ppl -- an odd feeling becuase the campus is
usually like a ghost town. alicia keyes will be at my
school on the 14th, and i'm looking fwd to that... also the
homecoming dance is the 20th... travis is going w/me to
that.. should prove to be interesting.. especially since
i'm not sure what the deal is with him and i (more on that
later).. also the play is the 25th -- i've tix for right
on the stage!!! how rockin is that???

yeah. gee. this is proving to be quite a long entry. i
guess its because this entry is the first of many.

alright. onto the juicy stuff. i guess. which i suppose
would be the love life/dating scene.... ok.. well. i was
interested in this guy travis (who is airforce), and we
were seeing each other, and he told someone that we
were "together", but he was intoxicated at the time. then
he said he wanted to go to homecoming w/me. naturally i was
excited. its been 2 weeks since then, we've only said
about 10 words to each other since then. so i don't know.
i don't know if i'm single, if i'm exclusively dating, if
i'm someone's girlfriend, or if i'm just insane.. its
frustrating.. because as long as i don't know there are
temptations (for lack of a better word).. there are other
boys whom i have met recently and whom i've known for
awhile who i am interested in. yet, i'm afraid to act on
any such interests so long as i'm unsure of my status. and
when i say act on these interests, i don't refer to
anything physical .. i'm referring to letting my mind
wander and letting myself flirt with others.. makes sense?
probably not, only to me.

ah wellz. i'm home. and thats good. have been helping a
bit at the store.. mostly helping out around home...

i miss my friends in va.. kinda feel like i'm missing out
on something exciting, when in reality there's prolly
nothing going on. crazy how that works eh?

i've tons of studying to do, since i've slacked off a lil
in regards to classes.. my heart just wasn't in it i guess,
and college allows a lil too much freedom in that respect.

signing out for the evening.