Marissa

Blood and Chocolate
2001-10-04 21:12:45 (UTC)

Fucking. .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .?

Hey everyone
Sup ? Not much here ! I am so mixed up ! Ok everyone knows
I like Adam but at the moment I am SO UPSET with him ! I
want to like him and no other guys but its fuckin hard !! I
mean I like him but when he fuckin doesn't get online and
doesn't write me e-mails and doesn't write in his journal
it really pisses the hell out of me ! What am I supposed to
do turn away any feelings I have for guys here just so I
can get online hoping that he sends me some mail ? I mean
doesn't getting into a relationship require both people to
put forth some effort ?! I mean I am giving and giving and
giving and not getting a damn thing in return ! I turned
feelings for guys I like here away so that I would not hurt
Adam but its getting frickin hard and yea ! What should I
do ?! I could really use some advice! I like adam but I
hate the way I am suffering ! Sure he says he loves me but
IDK ! URG ! I am so confused ! I need to be able to see how
much he cares ! I mean when I went out with this other guy
lets call him * red*( to keep his name a secret ! if you
are close to me you know who I am talking about ! ) and I
lived so far away from him , he still called me and wrote
me e-mails everyday and talked to me online all the time !
I mean isn't that the way it is suppose to be if you care
about someone who lives so far away ?!? I am sorry Adam if
you are reading this and you are getting upset but now you
know how I feel ! you know I like you so why are you being
like this ?! Wow that feels so much better!!!
So anyways school today was school ! Haha ! Although I got
to eat breakfast at school cause it was provided ! Hehe !
YUM ! All I ate was OJ cause I didn't feel the best this
morning !! Tomorrow is Kati's B-day ! :)! Happy b-day
kati ! hehe ! and tomorrow is the homecoming game ! :)!
Yes ! haha ! Its going to be a blast! Even though we will
lose ( as usual ) it will still be fun ! Nicole and I are
staying at Kati's house ! I think I am going to go to
Chris's Hockey game on Sat cause he wants me to go ! Ahh !
Hockey is so scary ! Oh Nate and Morgan are going out !
Awwww ! How cute ! I am sorry Nate if last night I seemed
mad at you or jelous I wasn't! I am happy for you and
Morgan and might I say ITS ABOUT TIME YOU TWO HOOKED UP !
haha ! oh oh I need to write the quotes for today and
yesterday ! "If you only hasve one hour to live, who would
you call, what would you say & why are you waiting ?"
and " Blessed are they that can laugh at themselves for
they will never ceased to be amused ! " ok those are the
quotes ! I have to go I got choir tonight !
Love ya
Marissa




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