once again
2001-10-03 04:57:24 (UTC)

good morning beautiful

Amica is sending me this c.d. with a country song on it,
even though I hate country, but it's titled "Good morning
beautiful". She knows that i'll love it because every
morning when we got up, Shawn would say good morning
beautiful...and now when he calls he does the same because
he always wakes me up. I believe in my heart that his best
intentions are in place here and that we will be together
some how. I feel it deep inside and I really wish I didn't
because I just am so scared I might be let down. See, I
believe that this will happen but I always prepare myself
fot the worst only because I can't stand the pain anymore.
i want the strength to be able to not stop and pause, cry
or feel crappy every time a song of ours comes on or
anything that means something of him and I is present.
It's killing me. i'll deal somehow. Promises are funny
things and they can make a happy world or crush you into
oblivion. You can't stop it either and try as you might to
prepare yourself...the are always surprises! So i just go
on ever day waiting to hear good morning beautiful.