kool_chic87

Erin's Thoughts and Feelings
2001-10-03 01:13:18 (UTC)

Today

Dear Diary,
My life sucks. I have great friends (Jenny, Laurie,
ALex) BUT my good friend Avalon just moved. As soon as she
was out of site and I knew that was the last time I would
see her I had to hold back tears. My friend Laurie is my
best friend. Although she always calls me names. She's a
great fun friend but often she makes me feel small. She
says I am stupid. I don't believe her but it hurts. She
says it sarcasticly but sometimes I can't tell if shes
joking or not. NO guy likes me. NO guy ever has. I have n
love life. I'm just a freak to all of them. It hurts.
Through all this theres a girl. She's only in grade 2.
She's very cute. When she smiles I smile. She makes me
happy. Also I just finished this book called Stargirl. It
was an excellent book. Very sad though. It gave me a good
look on life. Sometimes I feel hurt. Sometimes I feel like
nothing can hurt me and bring me down. I'm really confused
right now. I'm trying to be a lot nicer. I used to call
people freaks and stuff but now I'm trying hard not to
because Laurie says that to me and now I know how much it
hurts, even if i didnt mean it in a mean way it still
hurts. I'm also trying not to worry so much about guys
although this is very hard. I can do it. I'm going to start
a pebble basket. All you do is take a basket and when
somebody does something that makes you happy you put a
pebble in when somebody makes you sad you take one out. I
love the earth. I love life. I love god. I love animals. I
love family. I love friends. I LOVE MYSELF.