UxGxLxY

Even uglier

i took a look at beth's diary. she's kinda forgotten about
me, no suprise there. cody is kinda the only person around
these days. i don't see anyone anymore. today at lunch i
kinda realized it too. it hurts. nicole and hillary were
off in their own "inside joke" conversation not once
letting me know what was going on. i got up and left...
it's bad that i don't feel welcome at ONE City (where we
eat lunch) but it's even worse when you don't feel welcome
by your own friends. i sat alone again this morning. Russ
came down and said hi (some crazy anarchist kid i know) and
left... but he was just looking for dylan.
i shall quote cody "sometimes... i wish that i could just
dissapear"
i became enthralled(?) by The Catcher In the Rye today...
almost done with it. next on my book list is Slaughter
House 5. score. none of which i think i got the titles
right.
cody just instant messaged me... yeah, i guess one of the
big things that we don't have in common is the fact that he
has sooooooooooo many friends and here i am getting all
clingy.
that's why i miss eric so much. we were exactly alike... he
could even finish a thought that i was having trouble
coming up with a conclusion. always knew what i wanted to
say too... always knew what i was thinking and visa
versa... i just wish i had a friendship/relationship like
that again.

now i feel like crap....

"you don't know what it's like to be dead inside"