Queer Focus
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2001-10-01 06:48:01 (UTC)

Lost All Trust...Back @ Square 1

It would appear that I cannot trust people to the level
that I thought that I could. I have been maintaining a
diary for the better part of two months with no problem.
Today just HAD to be different from any other day though.
I woke up, to find Jordan reading through my on-line
journal...apparently he has been going through the history
log and inputting whatever hyperlinks that I have been
visiting. Now before you say, "It's a public site, if you
did not want him to read it, you should not have put it on
the web!!" I know that he has several different sites that
he writes in, but I have NEVER looked at even one of them
out of respect to him and his feelings. I thought that he
would respect me enough, to allow me a certain amount of
privacy, but apparently I am dead wrong. I am so pissed
off by this, I erased my previous entries and then I re-
submitted them, but changed my dairy name. I shouldn't
have to feel like I needed to do that, but I look at my
entries as my personal feelings on situations and I am
entitled to those. I have the right to share my opinions
with whomever I choose, but I also have the right NOT to
tell whomever I choose as well. It is things like this
that make me feel like I SHOULD move in with Lex and
Chance. At least they give me the respect to privacy that
you would expect from your own mate. But obviously, I do
not deserve that. I didn't even tell Jordan that I caught
him, I just let him think that I had just woken up...he
quickly closed out the saved and closed out the site to
finish at a later time, but I have since erased them. This
is the THIRD time that I have had my personal space
violated by a boyfriend (namely, my diary being pilfered
and read). I thought that Jordan was different from most,
but I was wrong....more and more each day, he is showing

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