Queer Focus
2001-10-01 06:41:38 (UTC)

It Struck Me Like A Lightening Bolt

Finally, after searching for weeks I have found other gay
people on this diary besides myself (hey Richard and
Alexi). There is something to be said about people that
identify, even when it comes to a simple on-line diary. I
like to feel like I am welcomed, so to know that, in fact,
there are others like me in here is quite comforting.

I have really been doing okay lately. I have been actively
looking for a new job because my current one (telemarketing
really sux), is not the job that I envision for myself. I
was gonna go back to school this semester, but I made a
mistake on the financial aide forms and they had to send it
back to me. So now, there is no way that I will be able to
get it back to them before school started. So now, I have
just had to push school back to the winter semester, that's
all. So, I can really focus on finding a job.

For those who are wondering, Jordan and myself are doing
wonderfully. I really came to an epiphany the other day
after reading what I had written in my first journal
entry. It really sounds like I am not in love with Jordan,
but take my word for it, I am. We have a special
connection that I would not destroy to save my life. I
love him. Slick is now with his wife (congrats are in
order, his wife just had her second daughter and I am the
godfather) and I am with Jordan. I am not saying that if
situations were to change and he was not with her and I
with Jordan, that I would not be with him. But right now,
as things stand, we are both happy where we are and we
should stay with that. Slick and I am really close friends
now and that's how we have to play it out...his wife
doesn't know about his past with me (why should she, they
were not together) and Jordan has accepted my past with
whomever and now the only person that I should devote
myself to is he. Life is beautiful!!