Stream of Consciousness
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2003-02-25 08:14:27 (UTC)

there is nothing i can say

what can i say? i guess im going to revert back to the
old way it was. things are going to go back to the way they
were for two years. i will no longer call her. i will no
longer seek her out. i ponder now why beth ever got back in
touch with me. were her motives pure? was she really
seeking friendship? or was she plotting to destroy me
further? to see if perhaps she still had control over me?
in this test i wonder how i faired? did i pass? or did i
fail and show myself to be very weak? all i can say is, im
going to go back to the way things were. and hopefully,
that will be ok with me. i dont need a woman. i dont need
anybody. all i need is my own opinion, my knives, and my
poetry. lets see the man, whatever form he may take. wether
its a beutiful woman, or an officer with a stick, take that
away from me.