2001-09-28 11:59:13 (UTC)


finially, friday. i have NOTHING planned this weekend. it
sucks. i guess all im gonna get to do is sleep and read.
man, my life really does suck. last night symphony rehearsal
sucked. first off, my dad forced me to take the car
somewhere for him before, so i was fashionably late. "is
starts at 7 doesnt it?"--no, it always starts at 6:30.
anyways, school yesterday wasnt bad at all. i didnt get much
homework, and i only missed a couple tests. im not looking
forward to today, but i can live. im so bored with my life.
i wish i could be more in touch with my friend megan. she
lives in galesburg with her aunt, uncle, and cousin. well we
met at the mall a LONG time ago, after i had one of my
friends go up to her and give her his cellphone. of course,
i was on the other end. LOL! what a great first impression.
well, it seemed to work, because we talked, and thats when i
knew. well we went around the mall, my group of guy friends,
her group of girl friends, and we saw each other at all the
stores. well my friend nate went and got her number for me,
i guess he realized i wasnt going to do it. so i got it. i
waited a day to call it, but i called. she was so glad i
called. it makes me wonder why i always meet the good ones,
yet they live a million miles away. so we kept in touch,
wishing to see each other for a while. and we finally saw
each other. we went, of course, to the mall! lol. she was in
town with a friend, called me up, and i met her at perkins.
we talked and hung out most of the day. it was great. shes
such a good friend to me. i miss her though. recently we
have kinda lost touch. i really should write her more, but i
dont know why, maybe because i dont have time, or shes just
so distant i dont remember. i should put a picture of her in
my locker! maybe that would remind me. i dont know what will
happen with megan. i want her in my life, because we
connected in such a way. i just dont know which way i want
her in my life, as a BEST friend, or my love. i guess i can
LOVE her, even if she's only a best friend. i just dont see
her enough to know if a physical/emotional relationship
would work out between us. we connect when we talk whether
it'd be on the phone or through a letter, almost chilling.
but u can only know for sure is what feelings go in person.
the time she was in town that i went to chill with her, we
went to barnes and noble for something to drink. well she
was in this one section looking at a book and i went behind
her and wrapped my arms around her. that felt, OMG, so good,
practically orgasmic. (if mary was reading this, she'd
prolly think i pre-ejaculated on her LOL!!!) so i knew then.
but i dont know what she's feeling or thinking anymore,
because that was then, and this is now, and we just kinda
grew apart. well now that ive rambled on for a long while, i
think i'll stop. more later, PEACE!