my thoughts that no one knows
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2003-02-22 05:28:31 (UTC)

birds and crap flying in the crappy air

crappy things. i dont like it when people hate me. i
also dont like the things going through my head. school is
screwed up. i know people have worse problems than me, but
theyve learned to deal with them. but guess what people:
i dont want my life to be crap! no one knows whats going
on inside my head. no one will ever know i dont think. no
one will know how much i hate school and hate things about
myself. no one will ever ever know whats going on inside
my head!!!! no one casres anyway. im just one of those
people. the people with friends who say they care, but if
you ever try to talk about anything..they freak out. makes
me feel like a fake. like i have no real friends.
my "best friend" pisses the crap out of me. every time
she talks, i want to punch ehr freaken lights out. she
thinks shes the queen and the world is her slaves. if
anything goes even the slightest bit wrong, she blames
anyone but her self. nothing interesting is going on in
her life, so she thinks that her whole entire life sucks.
she is such a blonde bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she talks crap
about me, just like im doing to anyone who bothers to read
this. i tapped into ehr email and saw all the stuff that
she sent to people, there was so much crap about me. and
the person she sent that to was my friend also. if that
friend doesnt tell me that my "best friend" talks crap
about me, then what am i suppsoed to do! go on
pretending! o ya, im sick of it. im sick of all the
crap that goes on in our school. i mean, there have been 4
drug busts this year. people screw other people, its so
wrong and nasty. my friends all have wrose problems than
me, but right now, i relaly dont care who ahs worse ones
and who doesnt, cuz im not used to this. if any one of
my "friends" knew half the crap that goes on inside my
twisted little head, they would freak out and get all "omg
V, are you ok! get help ! omg!" all ditzy losers. i
wanna move to california. really really really bad. ive
even thought about running away a few times, i wanted to
hitch a ride to cali, but i soon realized that would not go
so well. i wish my "best friend" would just leave me
alone. doesnt she get it! i DO NOT like her! at all! i
wish she would just move away or something! she complains
that people hate her, but no one at our school even knows
her! thats what pisses me off the most! shes a stupid
wanna be preppy-skater punk who thinks her life sucks when
she has got it made compared to me. this next part goes
out to you "best friend" : get out of my life and i wish
i never met you!!!!! i dont want to be your friend, just
go off with K and live happily ever after! i hate K, and
the more you tlak about her, the more i start hating you!
you dont understand the simple rules! rule 1: shut up and
dont say anything ditzy for at least 5 seconds. rule 2:
dont ever speak K's name, becasue she is the root to
practically most of my problems. rule 3: get out of my
life and mind your own ffreaken buisness rule 4: stop
getting sooo amd over the tiniest sarcastic things i
say!!!!! myabe cuz you dont know what sarcasm means,
doesnt mean you have to have pms 24/7 about
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! rule 5: yes i know i have
more friends than you, get over it, life goes on, live with
it! rule 6: dont speak to me when you can tell im sad.
ever. becasue then i just get mad!

she will probably never get it. i think her massive boobs
are using up too much brain power or soemthing. "like omg
this is liket he cutest shirt in like the world like!" she
is literally the bigest blonde ive ever met in my life.
shes so stupid and ditzy it makes a bird seem smarter.
which it proably is to begin with. anyway, enough
about "best friend". i am getting sick of this diary thing
because its not like it can help me with my problems and
its definatly not like anyone reads these worthless peices
of crap anyway. signed always