random scribbles
2003-02-22 00:53:23 (UTC)

gap year, cinema, theatre, food, good times.

[music - david bowie - mood - tired and full in a contented

today was so hot! i couldn't believe it... the streets even
smelled like summer, that kind of hot rubble mingled with
mown grass unmistakeable summer smell that always makes you
feel happy to be alive...

so this morning i was checking out stuff for my gap year. i
do really want to take a nols course. i have been thinking
about it for so long, and then i hear about this chance
to spend a year at a us high school. and i know what you're
thinking - why would anyone want to actually go back to
school for a year once they've escaped? :)
well i suppose the answer is that i love america. my one
experience of american high school was truly wonderful; the
sense of school spirit is something that is totally lacking
in england and i found really inspiring, and the curriculum
is so varied that you can take classes you *actually* find
interesting. plus it's not like i'd have to work too hard,
having already taken all my exams in england.
so it's something to think about anyway. i was saying to
harry a couple of days ago that i would always regret the
fact i didn't get to grow up in america. now i sort of have
the chance.
there have been a lot of great things about growing up in
england and part of me will always be drawn back to home...
marmite, red phone boxes, that kind of sarcastic resiliance
that most english people exhibit - these things are
trivial stereotypes but they are actually the things i
miss when away (as well as friends and family, natch)...
but america has this really powerful pull on me for
some reason.

anywho. went to see the ring today with harry, anna, faye
it was... definitely interesting. i don't know if i could
describe it as good, i mean it was well made, it was just
so damn nasty. films dont scare me too easily (at the time,
anyway, they can if i think about it later spook myself!!)
but this really made me jump and made me feel quite uneasy.
well the whole story is a horrible thought obviously. it had
that psychological element... you know... not like a
slasher where
you jump the whole way through then come out laughing. harry
came out looking fairly traumatised lol! (though after her
dreams experience, she probably shouldn't have been allowed
see it)

after, i went to meet lucy at prince of wales to queue for
RENT. this will probably be the last time we'll see it this
and therefore for a long time, i'm not sure if it'll be
back, the audiences really sucked this time. for example
tonight. it was a great show. everyone gave it their all
so caprice giving her all is unwelcome, but never mind) and
even though damien wasn't there, tom plays a really great
roger. but at the end the audience didn't even stand up. it
makes me feel really guilty when that happens. that's what
kind of gets to me about theatre... everyones a bit

still... the show... it will always choke me up. it hit home
that i only have a few months left with all my friends.
make a resolution, let's always stay friends.* people are
going off all over the country, all over the world... and i
only hope that we stay in touch. it was so great to spend
evening with lucy though, because we haven;t really seen
of each other recently. we had dinner at tgi fridays. ate
SO much
and had some lovely cocktails; it was a lot of fun. dad is
bein very generous recently which i found out from jacob is
because he has a new girlfriend. i actually met her but i
realise they were dating. she seems nice. kind of old. thick
german accent so i couldn't understand what she was saying.
i don't care because a) he's happy; b) the fact that she is
mentally sane puts her one above sue. i am a little wary
sue tainted our lives for a long time and, i think, came
close to destroying dad's and i can't bear the thought that
he would get so hurt again. it was really difficult. but, i
know that he needs company, someone to love and to love
him, and
even worse is the thought that he ends up alone.

one last thought. on the subject of crazy old women. on the
home this one got talking to me. actually she was great! she
was dressed up really nicely and had clearly been to some
or something because she had met julianne moore and had her
autograph. or so she said, anyway. whether it was true or
doesn't matter. she was delighted by her story. was telling
me all about it and about this club she went to in soho and
i should come down one time. it was funny and sweet and i
that she is living it up the way she thinks she is :)
she was trying to talk to this other guy, too, and at first
he was just totally ignoring her. giving really brief
answers, you know, the way you do when trying to get rid of
someone. i mean i couldn't blame him, because he was reading
this magazine and probably just trying to get home to bed.
but then after she'd been talking on and on, he started
talking back. and then she had nearly the whole carriage
talking to her. i think everyone was as delighted as i
was by her stories. she had a bunch of autographs in her
bag, i don't know whose they were, but she was loving
showing them around.

we got stuck in some tunnel. lucy goes, "wouldn't it
really suck if we got blown up right now?" i agreed
that it would, but then i realised that if we had been,
at least i would have been in a great mood after
talking to that woman, as opposed to feeling grumpy
about the fact i was on a sweaty, cramped tube full
of drunk people.

anyway - it's just a reminder to listen to people even
if you don't want to. everyone has an interesting
story to tell. and you never know, they might just be
a friend you haven't made yet.

ok. that was the cheesiest line ever. i better go
to bed now i think :) it comes from listening to
a song that reminds me of caroline and amherst and...
damn that was a fun trip.