tweak23

ramblings of a madwoman
2001-09-28 01:19:44 (UTC)

i just don't see why.

wow, what an awful day so far. my test thingie was brutally
unpleasant, barium tastes very much like a combination
between a mcdonald's milkshake, toothpaste and cement. it
is so difficult to swallow, and so uncomfortable in my
tummy.

then the day was sooo long. lunch was also unpleasant.
tiring of someone constantly laughing at me every chance
they had, i spat my diet pepsi into their face. they then
chased me for awhile to try and reciprocate with cream
soda, but then i went inside.

then it occured to me that i really have no friends. Well,
i do, but they're a lot fewer and farther between nowadays.
I've started to irritate people, and i don't mean to at
all.

i've just gotten to this point where my insecurities have
caused me to become really annoying, sort of
overcompensating for my inner shyness and trying to get the
attention i desperately need. it's such a selfish problem
and i hate it.

just, to anyone reading that i've pissed off in the last
little while, i formally apologize. please give me another
chance, i'm trying to un-learn my current behavior.

i would also like to extend a thank you to those people
that have been really kind and supportive the last little
while. JG (of course), DH and JF. thanks guys. you mean
lots.

i'm still very excited about finger eleven, tommorow! woo.

song of the moment: "quicksand" -f11.