synthetic_kitten

Someone like you
2003-02-18 06:00:20 (UTC)

typing passwords in the dark

M and I are no better and no worse. I hate that I always
start these entries talking about him, but its true and he
seems to be always on my mind. I want things to be so much
better, and they aren't. Maybe they will be, but I dont want
to wait. waiting hurts. i think sometimes maybe i should just
let him go, but he wont let me. he tells me he doesnt want to
break up. how do i handle that? i have 1/2 of a boyfriend. i
dont know where the other piece is, and dont really want the
whole thing until i find it.
why are boys so fickle?
i am 24 weeks now. its so awesome. i am so happy i am finally
pregnant, and that everything with my health and with hailey
is going well. shes perfect size, and i feel her move all the
time. she is way more active when i am alone, when it is just
me and her. she is definately my baby. i talk to her a lot.
its so crazy to think that in a few months i will be holding
her. that there will be times where her and i are alone. that
she will love me and trust me and need me more than anyone
else in this world. not even her daddy.
i hope he is around, but either way i will be fine. i love
her more than anything, and am ready for whatever else gets
thrown at me.
the whole thing is, when it comes down to it, i just want to
be happy.




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