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2003-02-17 12:11:40 (UTC)

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ok so this would be my second journal in less then 24
hours and yet i feel like i need to write more in here for
reasons im quite well aware quite lost
actually...lost in a sea of lard and booze and boys and im
sitting here wondering if this all takes a toll on me...a
toll that im not quite sure aware of how big it actually
is...its like hey hole umm can you tell me why your here
and exactly how big you are please and thanks? im missing
in parts of me and this might sound odd but im feeling
like somethings not there and it should be
should be there and making me happy and feeling
if your depressed then DON'T read my diary because i might
send you to kill yourself...geez what's wrong with me? i
can't go to sleep because then I won't go to class...I
studied for shit, I've wrote for shit, and yet I have no
qualms about this...I'm so lazy and unmotivated and
fucking all around shitty that my shit fucking shits! its
got a rectum of its own...Oh why you ask?...because im a
fucking ASS that's im being really hard on myself
this morning...its 6:45 a.m. and the sun is starting to
come out and I wanna go to bed but I can't and I feel like
hating myself so I am...i want to make a confession...

...all of the above is true. I have also murdered 47
human beings working as a KGB undercover agent. I own 4

i just took a deep breath and realized that I think im
scared of life...i know that i want to be free and blah
blah blah but i think deep down, subconsciously, I'm
fucking chicken more then a chicken on steriods and self therapy is quite amusing really...i sit and
try to think of things to write about myself...and i
question most of what i it bad to question
everything you write? who knows...i love green tea...i
love the sun...god damnit i love peanut butter!...i don't
question those however... feeling leg is shaking
rapidly and i realize now that im moving it...i feel like
eating food i gonna go to school? that movie
was really weird tonight...its gonna grow on me...i need
to see it again...and whatever happened to that song that
i tried to remember but couldnt? will i ever know it?

awww aldirtos going away for 4 days to montreal and ottawa
and im gonna miss him that spanish dancing urethra...hes a
good kid that alberto...makes me wanna cry (tear, wipe,
tear)...i like knowing that I have positive people in my
life now...alex, aldirto, natawhore, raymond, jo, and even
jonoton!...knowing that I have good people around me that
truly care and are there for me makes me happy...OMG that
was so gay it was gayer then richard simmons on a date
with nathan lane...hahaha that was fucking super cheese
mix 96 rold gold pretzels dance hits...but there see stuff
does make me happy...kylie makes me happy...coldplay and
madonna make me happy...alex i need to burn those fucking
cds and ray i need to pay you! remember fucking brain of
mine that is useless and always lazy and hungry...

ahhhhh the sun's up and i have to put on clothes soon to
meet the crazy world this morning...its fucking cold and
bitter mother just coughed in her
pink lighter is very pink...the sound of me typing these
very letters is soothing i find...i'm so glad i can pull
my foreskin back when my dick is soft...good news all

oh happy days!

im off to fend for myself and wonder "hey, exactly what
the fuck does chris martin see in gwyneth paltrow?"...pfft
celebrities...chris if your reading me...we'll
do penis...

muah muah

renzini renzini the great bambini*
*due to recent troubles with the law, renzini renzini the
great bambini cannot perform at parties where children
under the age of 6 are present or where there are extreme
amounts of penis.

Available for private parties and barmitzvahs!
Sadly, any parties not featuring at least one cute male
(straight or gay) cannot be serviced. We apologize for
any incoveninece this may cause.

The Board of Directors
Renzini Renzini Bambini Omnimedia Inc.

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