my manic world
2001-02-24 19:53:22 (UTC)

i take a drag, and then..

i take a drag, and then another, continuously, until its
gone. i kill myself each day, just as millions around the
world do. a habit so terrible, yet so hard to quit.
smoking, aahhhh smoking. last night was a very strange
night. i couldn't talk. i wasn't really thinking, i don't
know what i was doing. i sat there, almost in a coma, just
sat there, with thoughts briefly crossing my mind. it was
very weird, and yet somewhat relieving. i was calm, and
sedated. i liked it. it was easy, just being there,
almost lifeless. i am still not quite sure what to make of