Ad 2:
2003-02-16 06:32:23 (UTC)

why it's so complicated

Well the last entry sorta gave an intro to the problem but
really it's a lot deeper than simply I like a guy then i
find out he might be on drugs and I dont like that. Problem
is I've liked the guy for months, and never had an
opportunity to really talk to him. Guy might (and probably
does know) that I like/liked him. Guy might even like me
back (constant staring either related to paranoia about me
liking him or else interest... not sure). Earlier on in the
day that I found out about this whole drugs thing I found
out I got selected to go to this conference in Ottawa (yay)
for four days next month. AND, they want a male delegate to
come along with me. So of course I know that I will be
asked if I know anyone who wants to go. HERE COMES THE
---> the only guy I know in the age range given who is
interested in the topic of the conference (foreign policy --
not a real barn burner for most people) is him.
So I was all excited about this... cuz really a free trip
would make anyone say yes and especially since he likes
this stuff yeah he'd probably go. Go away with me, for four
days. Then I find this out.
So now I have been asked about finding this male delegate,
and as he is the only person I know who qualifies, I gave
his name. So I now face the possibility of going to Ottawa
with this boy whom I have admired from afar for like FOUR
FRIKKIN MONTHS and now I know that it should be HANDS OFF.
This is the opportunity that never came in the four months
(maybe fortunately in light of this info) but now I don't
know what's gonna happen. It's not like all the stuff I did
like about him has just gone away either. This is gonna be
so tough if it ends up happening.
No guarantees yet though, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed
for a happy ending somehow.