Vive La Revolucion
Dearest Diary of a Slut:
So this is my first diary entry made for me by me
without the whole "Art of Diaries" class rules thing on my
head...Its me and only me so kiss it all you lovely
people! It's now 3:45 in the A.M. and after saying
goodbye to Alex and Ray, I've come to the computer to
write my first official official diary entry of 2003!
WHERE'S THE FUCKING BALLOONS FOR FUCKSAKES? No, no just
kidding...though I will be celebrating this later today at
5 with all the pre-pubescent teenage boys (OMG you DO have
pubes! *high fives*) So heres my thoughts for today...
Hmmm...apparently I didn't have any. (looks around) Well
then I guess I'm off...
Ok seriously now children I did have thoughts. Did you
really think I didn't have any? K first things first, not
masturbating makes me really horny...like seriously now
Alex from Russia you so need to have sex with me on
Valentines Day you prick of an ass...Whoa its making me
all vulgar and shit...that can't happen...um next thing is
I'm a total whoreslut for not going to school or doing any
work today...I need to get my head in gear before I fail
school and become a prostitute sticking heroin in my arm
for blowjobs...haha that would be sooo much fun! Thirdly,
Igby Goes Down is a great film...pfft not as good as The
Joy of Pain written and directed by yours truly but
whatever...fourthly I can't believe that Alex thinks Jude
Law is ugly! WHAT IS THAT ABOUT? This is leading me to
believe that Alex (not from russia) is secretly from
another gay planet called Gaydron and not from the gay
planet where all the other gay boys come from called
Gaygarf...he worries me...what else? um i actually have a
valentines day date!! if alex from russia stiffs me or
provides me with an unsatisfactory date i hereby leave
myself no choice but to stab him and drain his blood and
then feed it to pirahnnas in the Amazon! hey survivor is
tomorrow...another goal in life is to be on Survivor...one
day jimmy one day (crosses fingers)...
On to more pressing issues...when am I gonna get laid???
hahahaha no in all seriousness im dedicating this
paragraph to my feelings about musicals and dancing and my
life...I call it...
"The Poem of Love"
This is what I love...
Oh wow sometimes I amaze myself with my hidden talent!
Call me Nicole...we'll do lunch! Whats with all my
exclamation marks! Like! Seriously! Valley! High!
When am I gonna be in laavveee? (that's love in punjabi
accent) I feel like expressing my desire to be in love in
a poem again:
"The Poem of Love V.2"
Can you hear me now cupid?
I said bitch can you hear me?
So, listen, um, get a fucking arrow
yeah, that's right, and place it at my heart
Make me fall in love
I wanna fly like a dove.
Cupid your a useless cunt
even though im on the hunt
i've decided to let you go
and live my life like a ho
my penis is wet
the cum is set
so this is the end
my love is a bend
in the streets of life
hey is that a kite?
Thank you all and good night!