RoseEssense

Blah

Well, Friday night, I worked of course. But I closed. And
then after that, Amanda, Jenny, Justin, Talon, Bobby, Randy
and I partied. Bobby works with me, and Randy is one of his
friends. Well, the night was fun, until the time came to
leave. Amanda and Jenny, got in a fight; literally, and
Justin was passed out so I almost literally had to carry
him inside his house. And I spent $25 dollars, for liquor
for myself, sense I hate beer, and only ended up having
four out of 18. I shared with everyone, but I didn't mind.
And by the end of the night, I had about a six pack left,
and now it's gone. I guess Justin and everyone drank it.
And I was supposed to get change back, and I didn't. Oh
well.
Then I had to work for Amanda on Saturday at 8 o'clock. So
I got like 3 1/2 hours of sleep. It was an alright day I
guess, but it still kind of sucked. Then finally, I got a
day off, which was today. So that was cool.
I've noticed now that I got this new journal, no body reads
it anymore. My friends have kind of departed from my life
completely, and I guess I can say it kind of sucks. You
know, Jenny and Jared broke up a week ago on Saturday, and
I admit, I guess I really didn't try to comfort Jenny very
much, except for an "it'll get better", or "Jared isn't
worth it" every once in awhile, but that was it. Because
that was pretty much all that needed to be said. I know how
sucky it is, and how what people say doesn't make hardly
any difference. I mean, I was there enough for her to know
that I cared, but not enough to become redundant. And I
think that was alright. But I don't think anyone else does.
I've lost a lot in my friends lately, and it seems no one
even notices. I've noticed that I've been getting left out
of so many things, and no one else notices. I started
working, and everyone blamed me for not spending time with
them. And yeah, I felt bad, but there was nothing I could
really do. And not to sound bitchy or anything, but I never
saw anyone trying to get ahold of me on my days off. But
you see, now I somewhat think that everything is fine,
especially after Friday night, when me, Amanda and Jenny
told each other how much we appreciated each other being
there and everything. But I guess I'm just having another
one of my moments. I see what Jenny goes through, and I see
what Amanda goes through, and they never come to me about
it. They always go to each other. Which is fine, I just
wish I was included in it sometimes. I mean, I was pretty
much the only one who didn't turn my back on Amanda when
the whole Talon/Jeston thing happened. Everyone resented
her because she broke up with Talon to go out with Jeston.
But I stood by her. The choices that she made were hers,
and I wasn't about to judge her for it. And everyone else
did.
Well, whatever. I'm sure I got the point across. Not like
anyone reads this anyways.
Shelby