madly enthused

the colors
2003-02-13 04:12:11 (UTC)

so i dont know how long ive..

so i dont know how long ive been writing in this journal
but to much suprise to myself, i received my first comment
from someone about my writing. it was nice and stimulated
a little thought on my part. it also reminded me that i
should try to write a little more.

of course all i ever have to write about is my pathetic
little high-schoolish relationship with dave. it's still
going well enough. at times i think it's bull shit. at
times i think it's not an adult relationship at all. and
sometimes i think if it's not an adult relationship, then
it isn't really what i want and that i should do something
about it. it's really hard to say something when you don't
know what you want to be heard. actually it's not just
that i don't want him to hear everything i'm thinking but
also that i don't know what all i am thinking. friday
we're going to the vagina monologues as a couple double
with mary and ryan. i don't know what i'm doing with
dave. i don't want the thing between us to be anything but
at the same time i think that it's sure a hell of a lot of
trouble to keep it as nothing. and i know he doesn't want
more so it only leaves less. and less would be ok. (by
less i mean having nothing at all). less is scary though.
i'm headed over to 1020. be home soon.




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