Str8 Girl, Interrupted

My Life is a Drama....
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2001-02-23 06:55:00 (UTC)

Bored....

Well...it's been quite sometime since I've written in
this. I really don't know why. I just haven't really been
inspired to write much lately. Didn't feel like bitching
about the same old stuff everyday...yanno? So, what makes
me come back? Boredom...plain and simple. I'm bored out
of mind. I've been outta work for like almost 3 months and
I've run out of things to occupiy my mind, so here I am
consoling in you, dear ol' diary. :)

Things have pretty much been the same with me and my
friends. Drama as always. Nothing too interesting to get
into, I suppose.

Marc, Chris and I are extremely close lately. It's like we
have this new relationship going. It's not just me and
Marc anymore. We've let Chris in. Now, whether or not
this lasts...it's beyond me, I can't tell from day to
day...for sure. Things change too quick for me to
predict. We have the most fun when we're just joking and
laughing, and blah blah. Marc and I are hardly ever home
now...we're always at Chris'. I mean, I haven't stayed
home in almost a week now. It's quite good and yet it's
bad. I really miss my apartment. I just don't miss Josh.
I know it sounds really bad, but......it's how I feel. We
just don't click too much anymore. We talk and I just
sense this attiutude...maybe he senses it from me and he
gives it back...I dont' really know.

Marc might start to see Brian...he's a really nice guy...on
the surface. There's something about him I just don't
trust. He seems a bit two faced. I don't know how to
describe it. He tells us what we want to hear, I guess is
a better way to put it. I mean, what does he tell his
other friends...does he humor them too? I don't know, I
guess. He's still friends with Mike and I really can't
stand him anymore...anything I say...gets all twisted and
turned around. It's quite annoying having to validate
every statement you make to people..."NOI SAID
THIS"...UGHH! I mean, wtf.....why can't you just take what
I say as I say it...don't read every other bull shit you
want into it. Good grief.

I'm so annoyed by every day life now, it's pathetic. I'm
just bored. I need to get a better routine going on here.
I sleep when I'm bored...and that's not good... I sleep
too much, I suppose, but what else is there to do.
NOTHING!! So, it's either, sleep, on the internet or
bitching about life...I choose sleep more times than the
others...ugh...it's boring. So, in closing...here's a poem
I wrote tonight... G'nite peeps. LOL

Bored


My mind wanders back and forth
And I wonder what I’m really worth

My shifts from though to thought
And I contemplate all the things I should’ve bought

My mind thinks about the times that lie ahead
And about the things I should have said

My mind drifts from all space and time
And I realize that things change at the drop of a dime

My mind jumbles to and fro
And I wonder, what the hell I really know

My mind consists of this and that
And I hope my life isn’t always this flat

My mind travels here and there
And yet I seem to get nowhere

My mind is open and shut
And I feel as if I should just give up

My mind is both adored and scorned
And I realize I must be really bored


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