CeRvEzA

Confused Malaysian
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2001-09-21 07:12:09 (UTC)

I Feel Like Writing

Today i really feel like writing. Im not a constant diary
writer. My english is bad.
I want to be somebody but i never took action. I cant be a
person i want to be because i dont want to hurt the people
i love most. I am afraid of god but im always confused. Im
trying to be logical and practical but they make me very
uncomfortable.

Hope this one will be more constant.

Last two days, I took an action with the help of alcohol. The
unbelievable happened. I met several phisically beatiful females. One
of them masturbated me inside a disco in public. Im 29 but mentally i
dont know where i am. I felt very happy but im always afraid. Anyway,
Im still thinking of doing it again. Maybe tonight. Ive been a loaner
for so long already.

I still believe in god but i cant stand the loneliness.


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