Just a 23 years old gay boy
2003-01-30 06:03:56 (UTC)

This morning

I want to put my old journals here but the old online
website's server is down for one day so I can't do anything
until it will be back to work again.

In this morning, I chose not to go to the gym for workout.
Usually,I workout everyday in the morning before I get to
work. For today, I felt like I want to go shopping. I want
to buy some clothes before the chinese new year. Chinese
New Year will be start tomorrow. What a good decision that
I have made ! I did shopping on business area. It's called
Silom Road. You can find everything that you want on this
road. I walked around to see what I can buy and what I
like. There are many red t-shirts with chinese character
on. Do I have to buy one, HAHAHA. I don't think so. I
bought some bakery for my co-worker and I bought two adidas
shirt for myself. I like these shirts. There are blue and
grey color with rubby logo team on. I think they looks nice
and cool. After shopping I walked to my office. There are
nothing new, just can't find anything to do so I put myself
busy by writing this journal. Oh! Btw, I took a look at my
EX face-pic. Oh! My God, There are 822 people who visited
his page !!! I can't believe that it's more than usual. I
know my EX is online everyday and maybe he is trying to
catch a CUTE FUCKING BOY on net to have sex with or maybe
more than that !! Who knows ??? I can't think that he is
looking for a LTR with some boys from the net. I know, I am
jealous with him but well, he has been my partner before
even it's over already but I still love him and hope that I
will be with him in the same status as it used to
be, "PARTNER". I don't want to be just his friend. I hope
that you will understnad that love for lover and love for
friend are totally different !! I love him as a lover not a
friend. I can't make my mind to accept in this condition
that he gave to me. God! Please help me back into my path.
I lost and I am blind. In this afternoon I will check him
out at face-pic again. I miss him so much. This is the
second weeks that we haven't talked or chatted with each
other. I just saw his old pics at his face-pic web. DAMN !
I don't want to be like this but I can't talk with him like
a friend.