SlinkyheadRant

My Depression In Words
2003-01-28 03:53:09 (UTC)

Wha-? How? Who?

Listening to:
Colorblind

Dear Jamie,
I'll never know how I did it! I really won't. I was
mean, I was nasty, I was a horrible person. And thats NOT
me! I couldn't take it anymore. No offence Ashleigh but I
went crawling back like a puppy who knows he did something
wrong. and Diana. If you hate me after this I can
understand. I can only hope that you felt the same way I
did. I felt horrible from the beginning. Like it was all my
fault. I was wrong in so many ways. I did so many things I
shouldn't have. I said things that should've been settled
civilly. I went about it all wrong. And I see it as my
fault. I'm sorry Diana! I can't apologize enough. I know
you're off somewhere still feeling the same but when she
offers you notes and then she doesn't hate you it doesn't
make sence. Then point of hating someone is to get hate in
return. This is my theory. I don't know what I wanted but I
hated. I don't know what I hated. I'm so lost. Jeb and
Ashley both went back too. I mean we all just did things we
shouldn't have. She's going to see a psycologist for her
problems now. Its not that I didn't want to listen to them,
its just that it was always "My life sucks." and maybe it
does but it got annoying after awhile. I should've just
come to you and told you how I felt but I couldn't cause I
knew it would crush you. SO I decided to do it slowly and
more painfully? I don't know! I don't know what how or why
I did what i did. I just don't get it. I need to rest.
G'night.

P.S. To diana: A MILLION APOLOGIES! I AM WEAK AND STUPID!

G'night Diary.




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