Confused and Teenage
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2001-09-16 22:34:38 (UTC)

There are two sides to every story

Dear Christy,

As I intruded on your privacy today, I couldn't help but
think what a strange world we have today. Maybe this is
the modern way that a dad and his daughter talk about
things. When I was your age, I sometimes managed to talk
to my dad directly about things, but not often. It seemed
that anytime I really wanted to talk to him, it was always
about something that was really hard to talk about. But, I
am going give this a try...

I had a couple of thoughts as I read through your diary.
One thought is that, perhaps I am sorry that I did. I am
not sure, but it is done and I can't undo it. I would only
ask that you give me the same understanding that you ask
from me, regarding things that sometimes happen. I read
this at the urging of a nameless someone who is concerned
about you (=truthful excuse).

Another thought is that I don't think the things that are
going through your mind are so different than when I was
your age. I guess my dad never had the opportunity to
experience them so eloquently as I have, but then we didn't
have this wonderful online diary in which to communicate.
I recognize each one of them though, although you probably
don't think so.

I am not going to try to defend against some of your less
flattering feelings regarding us. After all, you feel the
way about us that you feel. I can only say that your mom
and I recognize that we are not perfect. We make mistakes
as parents, and will continue to make mistakes. Please try
to forgive our mistakes too. I only hope that when you are
grown up that you and Becky can look back more positively
than you suggested.

When you are a dad (???), you pretty much want to do
whatever you can so that your kids grow up to be happy.
This is a funny process, because it seems that so many
times (seems like always) this means making them unhappy.
Consider, me telling you to fold the laundry. I take no
pleasure in harassing you to do this, but I feel that I
must so that one day you will fold your own laundry. That
one's easy. Others are not so easy. Like when I see you
with kids that I think are going to get you into trouble.
When I first learned to drive, I used to drive around our
neighborhood rather fast (understatement), and I didn't
understand why anyone would mind. What's funny now is how
mad I get, when I see somebody come up the hill at about 60
mph, and I see Becky walking down the road. You wait, the
same thing will happen to you. You'll probably never
realize how much fun I had taking you driving at the high
school the other night, and just so you know, I was never
even close to incontinence - not even close.

I have one last thought, I guess it is more of a request
really. (This is sort of like when you ask to sleepover,
or for money to go to the movies.) I don't really
understand writing about problems in our family in your
online diary. I can't prevent this, and in fact I am not
even going to try. I guess I would just ask if maybe in
the future, you could leave out some (maybe just a little)
of the sordid details.

Your mom and I love you very much.

How did I do?

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