me

Ignorance is bliss
2003-01-25 05:10:51 (UTC)

the movies

we went to the movies instead i had fun but i was scared i
was going to say something wrong and she would think i was
an idiot lately i have been a little down i guess just
worring christle is leaving for louisiana tuesday so again
iwill be alone with my thoughts and that is the scariest
thing off all i don't know just some kind of companey maybe
i will just take seroquel and go to bed but then at night i
have to look at the pills and all i want to do is take them
all i haven't been going to counseling i haven't seen my
docter in weeks christle hates me i thought today about one
time my sister was going out to eat with no one she said
but i found out later on she and christle had went out to
eat together another family outting i was left out on what
is it about me that makes everyone around me want to hurl
my family hates me except for two people they think i'm
some kind of a psyco because i rage i try to keep it inside
i don't know how to stop i don't know a good way to channel
it i scare everyone away from me i don't know i am going to
stop mouping i will probably write like a zillion more
diaries tonight because i am home alone and i want ot stay
up all noght because felicia is coming really early in the
morning and i want to be up so that i can see her before
she goes to work




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