Str8 Girl, Interrupted

My Life is a Drama....
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2003-01-23 11:09:54 (UTC)

I'm gonna frickin' snap...

So, it's 6 am...I'm tired...feeling a little bit
depressed...and I have to go to the bathroom. Fun, fun,
huh? Yah, so, I hate living where I'm living. I feel so
freakin' constricted that I could just have a nervous
breakdown at any moment. I hate to be a bitch about
things, but this whole...let's be a happy semi-gay family
isn't working to my best interest. I guess, some ppl would
say that I should stop being so damned selfish, but DAMN!!!!
I worked so hard to get where I'm at, at this point in my
life......I don't want to take two steps back for every two
steps I've taken forward.

I hate myself....physically, anyway. I need to loose
weight. I know this, but I don't know how. The obvious
answer would be to stop eating, but I really don't eat all
that much. It's all the years that I never took care of
myself, that's finally catching up with me, emotionally and
physically. I'm going to order some diet pills, from the
internet. I know that it's not the best idea, but a lot
cheaper than paying for doctor's expenses and then the
prescription on top of that. So, that's about it. I'm
gonna go watch some more television. lol...I know it's not
really all that funny,'s laugh or cry. I
choose to laugh. :)