hopes&dreams

hopes,dreams,&fears
2003-01-18 05:57:37 (UTC)

body image blues

I haven’t really ever loved my body...for some reason
though my friends all seemed to have been deceived by me,
because I let out loud a complaint or maybe an insecurity
about my body recently, and I really threw everyone off.
People commented about how unlike me that statement was,
and it wasn’t something they were use to hearing out of.

But I don’t believe that my friends are blind.... they
have to notice that my body has gained weight. I am no
longer a looker (if I ever was one). I have this
overwhelming feeling that I am very unattractive right
now. Maybe I am just feeling lower than usual about
myself. But I can't really understand why. My boyfriend
sincerely likes the way I look, I turn him on physically, and
he is so wonderful and loving with me (he truly is
amazing). And my friends are always supportive when they
think I look nice. I am not experiencing a low in my life
outside of my appearance. I just truly don’t like the way
that I look. I know that it is up to me to fix it. I
have begun to exercise and am trying to eat healthier....
but I cant help but feel so defeated, how did I ever let
myself look this bad.

BLAH ICKIE ICKIE YUCK YUCK

Instant gratification takes too long.
--- Carrie Fisher

Everything has beauty but not everyone sees it.
--- Anon




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