BeautyFiend

The void
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2003-01-15 14:23:34 (UTC)

I'm so Dumb

man, i never realised just how thick i am!i can't write a
decent poem to save my life or story for that matter.my
english assignment consists of a short story and
commentary. how the fuck am i going to manage that?!it's
due in two weeks time!ffuuccckkkk!
my spelling leaves something to be desired as well.for
anyone that's actually read any of my entries (probabley
not) you will realise that i need to go back to year 3 when
spelling tests were essential!

Remember
I went through it
that phase that always passes
just leaves and drifts into the breeze
but does it dwell?
somewhere deep inside
is it still prolonged in my heart?
a cancer that will never depart
i look in the mirror
it is all i see
i smile
it is all i see
it burns and takes my oxygen
suffocating,leathal
i will always remember the pain i felt
i will always remember

ahhh that's shit.a little depressed moment from year 10.you
can tell a teenager wrote that can't you?
typical 'depressed phase'. why does everything that happens
in your teen years have to be classed as a 'phase'?so let
me get this straight..you go through the 'gay phase'
the 'goth phase' (for sum ppl) the 'depressed phase'
the 'spiritual phase' the 'just plain stupid phase' and the
more recent (some would say not me may i add) 'self-harm
phase' now this is something that pisses me off rather
alot.people that think self-harm is something that is in
the media so everyone decides to copy it.that couldn't be
more wrong if u ask me.obviously anyone that thinks that
way has never been in that situation so maybe they
should..shut the fuck up?as for anyone that says "oh self-
harm wasn't around in my day" that's total bollocks because
self-harm was around people just didn't realise it was
going on as self-harmers kept it to themselves!and if it
was noticed they were cast off as shitzophrenic!
so this teen phase thing,maybe your teenage years are a
perfect opportunity to try new things and experiment.well
that's how i see it anyway.personally i believe the so
called 'phases' end at 16/17 you are getting older by that
age and becoming an adult, you are more aware of what you
want and who you are.

These dark clouds
swirling in my head
replaying to me
things i should have said
i never thought it could be this way
the light clouds go
and the dark clouds stay.

it brings me to my knees to know
it could have been prevented
i could have said no
i truely never meant to break your heart
i wish i could have seen this right from the start

the pointless tears fall from my eyes
tears that are nothing but guilt and lies
and through all this one things true
my belief in the strength of my love for you.

i have no idea what i'm babbling on about here.so i'm going
to shut up with the poems.wite more later.
paaaaaaaaaahh.


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