Shadow

Step inside the mind of a maniac
2001-09-10 17:58:11 (UTC)

Little Love Life Update, cause well, no reason ^_^

Well if you already read my first few entries, you'll
already know this part of my life is a little weird, well i
might as well go the whole hog and reveal just how sad i
am. Okay , so with well one reason or another, i dont know
exactly what it is, but in real life, i have never had a
girlfriend, never heard a girls had a crush on me, well,
except the times its been followed by thousands of laughs,
obviously one of those joke things, i wont explain cause
hey, we've all done or been involved in something like
that, from one or other of the sides. And i've always been
turned down whenever i tell a girl i like them etc etc. So
as you can probably see, its not exactly the most pleasent
part of my life. So er whats my point ^_~
Okay so well, anyways, next thing is just to explain that i
have actually tried, and just because i have a net gf,
doesnt mean i have just gone for them and completely
abandoned the possiblity of something happening in real
life, and well, this has happened well, not because i'm
desperate, i'm not quite at that stage yet, and well i
really like my current net gf, like a said shes a great
friend, and a really great person

Okay well, onto the little problem. Okay well firstly, this
girl i will mention is extremely likely to read this, but
what the hell, theres always worse ways of finding out
these things ^^
Anyways, okay , onto business as they say, well, i cant
stress how happy i am with my current net gf ( nothing to
do with the fact she could find and read this post, honest
^_~ )
but with my current life, i have plenty of time to think,
not something i usually do , but i do try and have a decent
think every now and again, it just helps everything keep
clear ( yeah right ) and okay in my life. So anyways,
theres also this other girl ( god how many times have i
heard this story for other people, i know , kill me , KILL
ME NOW! ) and well, is like 4800 miles closer, and well, is
actually in england with me, and i'm meeting sometime
within now and well, this time next year ^_^, or i plan to,
and well ( yes i know, if your reading this , those things
kinda gave away who you are ^^;; ). Anyway, in many ways
each of these 2 people are the same, i mean one was born on
december 15th, the other ( really sorry if i got this
wrong ) 26th december, and both are really talented
artists, and both are really sweet and caring, and well, in
many ways they are extremely similar, and well, at the same
time both are different. i mean i really like both of them,
and the one i'm not with , i swore a bazillion times, to
both myself, and in her presences ( although thats when we
were talking about people in general and stuff blah blah
blah ) so anything like that could possibly be a bad idea,
cause i mean there are so many reasons , like i'm happy
with my current net gf, and would never want her to think
shes some sorta back up or anything, or i wouldnt wanna
prove her little sister right ^_~. And theres a bunch of
other reasons

Anyway, i guess i'm just someone who has too much time to
think , or whether i just keep my options open , whatever
it is i dont know, the only thing i know for sure is that
i'm happy with things as they are, and wont change my
situation as it is now, well at least not for a good long
while, or without a real good reason.

Tip for today - Listen to your heart, Listen to your mind,
and eventually you'll find out what you want, and hopefully
a way to get it.

Bye for now, Matt