darling

spellbound
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2003-01-08 04:04:40 (UTC)

testing,,,

Sex. what does it do to a person but cause stress. yeah
the moments of passion can make you feel so wonderful, but
what about after. after the passion and intimacy is over?
i made the choice to have sex a long time ago. i will
never say it was a bad choice, it was the next step in my
relationships that i felt i was ready for. but why? why
spend nights with the cramps and nausea i recieved from
birthcontrol? i could handle that till it really started
messing up my body. which was my fault of course for not
keeping a strict schedual but its hard, im under a lot of
stress sometimes. so i would forget, its normal. while in
my last relationship my body got so screwed up from those
pills. non-stop bleeding, pains in my side, sometimes
unbareable. so i stopped. but the sex didnt. i never
worried so much about things. worried about what could
happend? all i would do is wait, wait for the cramps to
come back, the cramps that i hated so much just to come to
re-insure myself that i would be ok. now im in the same
situation, same thing every month, expect it hasnt come.
its been two months and all im doing is stressing. i know
the stress isnt helping and may even be preventing it but
it still hasnt come. i guess all i can do is take another
test...


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