Mindy aka Cutie

The life of a suicidal Teenager.
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2003-01-05 19:51:52 (UTC)

God

i don't understand anything about god or what god does.
And maybe that's the whole mystery of him. Like I know
that god loves us and everything but if he loves us so much
then why does he let us suffer so much. "Without suffering
there is no compassion" I know but, tell that to those who
suffer. And if god is so perfect and everything then why
did he have to create man to worship and love him. Didn't
he already have enough love? Just things I was wondering
today in church. Yea, Jon was supposed to call me this
morning to go to church with me. He didn't. So, I called
his mother and asked if he was there. She replied, "He
stayed over at Racheals (his sisters) and he probably over
slept." Well, that's great. So I was like fuck, the only
way I will go to church is if I have someone I know/love go
wtih me. And he wasn't going...obviously. So, I thought
to myself you already got up, might as well go through with
it. It sucked big. I hate people I don't like or know.
And most of them are all hypocrites anyways. I got so
pissed of at so many people. Just because they are one way
at church but totally different at school or when I see
them in public. They're in god's house...I mean they could
at least not lie and act like they normally do. FUCKING A.


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