sublimegrly

My Perfectly UnSublime Life
2003-01-02 15:05:38 (UTC)

Hope yours was Better

Did you have a good New Year? I spent mine watching
everyone rock out on MTV alone with my dog. The kids were
in bed. My husband decided he wanted to stay at work until
4 am working on the computers. Something that really did
not need to be done. That didn't bother me though we'd get
in a fight if he was here anyways. I can't stand him. Now
he is trying to tell me what I can and can't wear. It's
usually that my pants are to low. Oh fuckin' well. I
watch it when I bend over and wear low riding thongs from
Victoria Secret. He is just a jerk off. I don't know why
he just won't let me go. I wish some other woman would
take him away. Isn't that horrible. Most people worry
about their spouse cheating. I wish mine would. I keep
telling myself that my web design studio will take off and
I will make it on my own. Maybe when the kids are older.
I woun't be to old. Maybe I still can find someone to
love. Maybe I will be destined to be alone. But this
can't be my life. Living with a man who is completley
fucked up in the head, in a house where he does nothing to
improve it, fucked up inlaws, no friends. This cannot be
my life. My kids are great and I am trying to make a
normal life for them. But am I. They see hime yell at me
and tell me he is the man and he bring s home the bacon and
I should do everything to please him. why? Why shouldn't
someone please me. Why can't it be mutual? I think I would
enjoy pleasing some one who I was attracted to. You know
those story book loves. Where that person just turns you
on so bad. I want that. Who I really want in Mithcell.
Maybe tomorrow I'l talk about him. I think I will try to
get up and go to the beach or something.




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