Amy

uncertain reality
2002-12-31 08:40:56 (UTC)

things have changed

It's winter break. Bill came up from Cali. he was different
this time... more flirty. i was welcoming... nothing really
happened between us, we just held hands and took walks and
talked and talked and talked and joked and laughed and
smiled. it was great. i hadnt been so happy since... well
its been a long time. i couldnt keep a straight face. i saw
him friday and then again on sunday. right now he's on a
train back to Cali. he'll get there around 2:30 am -> 2
hours from now. he has my email addy so i hope he does
email me. i was so giddy, so happy... it was great!
Then today, i had invited Anna to go shopping with me since
i got a lot of gift certificates for christmas and wanted
to catch the sales. she said she wanted to go. i had first
asked her about it on saturday. it was 10:30 this morning
when i called... and she said that she couldnt go. We got a
late start on shopping. Our first stop was Old Navy. And
guess who i saw there. Why it was Anna, along with Rhea,
Kristen, Callie and Kim. Well i thought she couldnt do
anything because her grandparents were in town.... oh well
i guess i'm not important enough to be included in their
plans. i walked over to Rhea Anna and Kristen. Anna looked
a bit shocked. Anna called tonight around a quarter to 11.
She said that her family was planning on doing something
today, but then their plans got canceled.. and about a half
hour after i called at 10:30 this morning, Rhea called and
invited Anna over. Well Anna said that she called my house
to see if i could come too... BULL SHIT! there isn't a
possible way for her to have called and gotten to Old Navy
before we did... i was driving. that kinda ticked me off a
little more. now i dont know who i can trust....
I've been gaining weight and losing weight and gaining
weight and losing weight. Christmas i was up 121.5 ->
yesterday morning i woke up and weighed 114.5 -> tonight i
weighed myself and i'm up to 118.5! I was so happy to see
that 114.5 on the scale... its less than i've weighed in
over a year. and when i went shopping today, i'm either a
size 5 or a size 3. can you believe it?! size three!!!!!
that was like when i was in seventh grade!!! :D but i still
need to lose some fat around my middle so the pants dont
cut into my sides so much (icky) i refused to buy a size 7
because i knew i wouldnt wear them much longer. anyways i
got 5 pairs of pants, a couple shirts and a jacket. And i
love them. very me. i was shopping by myself, so there was
nobody else to influence my decisions. i liked it a lot.


~Amy




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