2002-12-30 21:07:58 (UTC)

Wow was I Pathetic and Stupid or what??????

LoL......oh wow, its been almost a year since i've written
in this journal, because i had retired it, but i was
curious as to what my world was liek a year ago so i
cracked it back open. I read every single journal entry i
wrote in hear, and igotta say i was a dumb mother fucker.
LoL....I mean come on adam. I was soo blind that i didn't
see the lies and the bullshit and the heartbreak were
nothin. I was soo stupid. lol i mean i wanna beat my self
with a stick over and over for being so retarded and
believing and fighting through all that shit. It was
absolutely worthless. If anyone ever read this journal
then they know what I'm talking about. It was a horrible
waste of time..It hurt sometimes. But looking back, it was
more stupidity and a lust for someone to want me, than me
being in love. LoL and i seemed to have quiete a few
entries called "its just one of those days" altho with me
hurting my neck real bad i had alot of those. I found it
kinda funny backin one of my first journal entries i said
"Welll its our first game tonight.blah b lah blah...I hope
i "DO" hurt myself" I meant that i don't hurt myself but
yeah. I found that funny just because i did end up hurting
myself and hurting myself real bad.......

On to life now, i'm still retiring this journal....but i
figured memories are good right? even if they are stupid.
They are mine and my choices led to these entries.
Anyways, life now is okay......During football season I was
an assistant coach for our highschool football team ( I am
16 now and a sophmore in highschool) I mainly work with
the freshman and they're team. But the guys had faith in
me and i worked my ass off for them....Anyways nowadays i'm
playing basketball for our squad. Our varsity is 3-2 and
our JV is 3-1 (this is very good considering the Varsity
only Won a total of 5 games all last year) Things are
going alright...I still havent had a girlfriend in almost
two years but i aint to worried about it. I had this girl
i liked but she liked me this other guy the other guys
brother the guy next door. lol blah blah blah (she didnt
really like all those guys but thats kind of an inside
story) So i've basically given up on her and moved on with
my life. Things are goign alright school is good dumb but

Last summer I bought a 1990 red ford mustang convertible
and i've been crackin in tharr. It's fuckin sweet as

I am still good friends with my girl stephy, and very good
friends with my girl rachy as well. As for
i stopped writing in here i found out some things about her
and haven't talked to her since. and that "nicko" or "red"
guy...well lol the hell if i know.

well keep it crackin this has been yo boys final entry.
Incase you wanna keep up on me, you can read my new journal
"Anger Management" lol its interesting but pretty dumb.
Anyways this playa is out

Keep it crackin
Signin out for his last time...