ted morrison jnr
2001-09-04 03:24:39 (UTC)

american homo goes home, returns

so i went on a vacation to my parents place in tennessee. i
grew up there and it was awful so i do not always look
forward to these trips, which i make about twice a year.
even though my childhood was miserable and dramatic and
awful, i retain a close relationship with my family and also
with the friends i made there. so anyway, i go there to
visit and end up having a great time, hanging out at the
only (and usually empty) gay bar and in abandoned barns,
which are abundant and all beautiful. i got in touch with
old friends and made some new ones which was a surprise and
happy experience.
"you don't want to sound dumb,
don't want to offend
so don't call me a faggot unless you are a friend
then if you're tall, handsome and strong,
you can wear the uniform and i can play along"-joe jackson,
tori amos
wild. the weather here is cold already. the newspaper
proclaimed the end of summer, no more sweaty cock-jobs out
by the water, salty and crazy, hidden and naked. ah.
has anyone heard this new tori amos album? "strange little
girls"? she covers eminem's "bonnie and clyde". fruitcake,
extra nuts. absolutely crazed. it makes me miss those lsd
epiphanies one would have, lying naked in the driveway,
pretending the trees were diana ross and the supremes,
i often wonder if this "audience" or "community" is a lot
younger than i. i wonder about actually connecting with
anyone on this level, invisible approval, immediate
response. it seems futile, as i have written many missives
and have yet to receive a response. what is that about?