laura_h

Laura's need to rant and chat
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2002-12-28 14:39:08 (UTC)

I'm back again

Hey all again. I did some interneting, and it really
didn't help much. I have the tv on and I can't stand
anything on as usual. If there weren't a few shows I love
to watch on tv I'd probably just dump my cable and use
videos and dvd's.
Fuck!!! This is not what I wanted to rant about. OH
well!!!!

Let's see, why am I writing this? I need a place to be
free from the problems of life. So am I going to spill all
of my problems? well, here goes!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1. I am trying to get a divorce from a hateful person who
turned his back on me to play Everquest and invite other
women to visit him when his company sent him to Vegas
(telling these other women I'd be there for "all" of us
to "play" together.)

2. I am in the middle of a family screaming match over my
life, need a job, want to go to school, etc... The fact
that I want to move far away from here and start over.

3. I have finally admitted that I am either bi or gay,
haven't figured out which label I like better or dislike
lease? I have always "dated/married" men because, "that's
what you do, you be normal" at least according to my mom.
True when I first went to school (undergrad college) there
was a term that went around the school called "LUG" les
until grad, and I did the "in" thing of being with another
woman, but I thought I would be just the type of girl who
was working a trend, not really realizing my true self.
(dam that was a lot)

4. I have one guy, Duane, wanted to date me and be with me
and me to "marry" (hello divoring someone, no want to heavy
relationships) him, but I hate hurting people so what do I
do.

5. I have another friend, Ritchard, who really likes me,
but only wants me to be happy as far as taking me to the
local allnight breakfast bar resturant to flirt with a
girl, who just told me last night that she's dating some
guy, but the other few times I was in there she seemed to
be flirting with me. I guess I just need to give my ego a
bit of a boost.

6. And finally, I think, I just hate the way Karma doesn't
seem to work. My family (because of my dad's job) always
moved with the same group of people, there was this family
and they had one son, adopted who is my older sister's age,
who I will call S and one son, their own kid, who is my
age , will call him A, and the younger one, the fucker, A,
raped me repeatly and which was my first time and the
father "D" who is an asshole, letch, asshole, teaches
assholeness. S was the best person, kindest soul and so
wonderful. WEll, their mother, M, is dying of breast
cancer and now HOSPICS has been called out to help her. I
can't believe that she is dying and A and D are having the
times of their lives fucking up other people's lives.

Ok, if that wasn't confusing enough, I don't know what is.

Well, have a good day, and I may be back soon to scream,
rant and rave, and get this crap off my chest.

Laura


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