starrynite1226

The Story of Me
2001-09-03 02:02:20 (UTC)

life is too short for this crap.

Routines bore me. I have never been the one to be
predictable or even practical. But alas, that's what I've
turned into. A mindless sap that has settled into the same
old boring routine, day in and day out. Thank goodness that
in 2 days I can go out and look for a job. I won't be stuck
here with my brothers all day long. Then I can get out of
the house, and I can't believe what I am saying. I hate
work. I always have. I just can't get into it. I'll love my
job for the first couple of months, then it all starts to
become a routine, and by the time I hit a year at the same
job, I'm ready to quit. It's been that way with all of my
jobs.

So here I sit, writing about completely nothing in this
journal that I don't even care to keep anymore. I started
it because I had some issues to work through. And now I can
hardly think of anything to write about. Odd huh? I guess I
shouldn't complain. I'm not wallowing in self pity or
anything. I just don't know. I know that my medicine has
helped me, and I am thankful for that. I don't feel the way
that I felt a month ago. I know that what has happened in
my life and how that has affected me will never change, but
my outlook towards it has. I don't carry around all of the
hate that I once did. Most importantly, I don't hate myself
anymore for feeling like I did. Maybe that makes sence,
maybe it doesn't. But it does to me, and that's all that
matters.

I'm gonna end this for now, before I do too much rambling.
wait, too late for that. Maybe I'll write again soon with
something more interesting. Yeah, right.