*MS JLYN*

*ALL CRIED OUT OVER U*
2001-09-02 15:47:48 (UTC)

Sept. 2

Well, I guess today is going to be another boring day for
me. I was suppose to be going to Atlanta, but Faris doesn't
feel good. It kinda pisses me off because he knew he was
sick and just yesterday he was all hyped about going and he
said he was going whether or not he was sick or not. Faris
always does this. Maybe I'm just being selfish, but I think
he's being selfish also because he didn't consider the fact
that I really wanted to go. He just doesn't care. I mean,
he always pulls shit like this with me. It makes me really
mad because I would never do this to him, but he constantly
does this to me. I wish he would change his mind and go
ahead and go. But for some reason I think something else
came up and he just didn't want to say that or he is still
going and just didn't want me to go. I hate Faris for the
way he is sometimes towards me. Not trying to sound shallow
or anything, but if it wasn't for me....Faris would be a
nobody! I hate to say that, but it's true. I put Faris in
the position he is in....people know him because I talk
about him all the time. I'm sorry if I sound really harsh,
but I'm soooo mad right now. So, here's another weekend
down the damn drain. A weekend I could have worked and made
some money, but yet I was led to believe that I would be
going to Atlanta to have fun. I wonder if I could catch a
ride with Travis....oh yeah, he's already up there. Man, I
hate this. We are suppose to be going to Morris Brown's
homecoming...I was suppose to be riding with Faris up
there, but I don't know if I can depend on that anymore. I
don't trust him for anything...as far as going places with
him. I just don't get it. He invites me to go to these
places, but then when the time comes to go...he acts as
though he doesn't want me to be there. I just don't
understand it. I could just scream right now. I COULD HAVE
HAD A REALLY GOOD TIME =O I HATE THIS. Watch something
happen and I miss it. Like, watch Leroy be there or
something. Or someone else show up....I MISSED IT BECAUSE I
ALWAYS DEPEND ON SOMEONE WHO I KNOW DOES THIS TO ME TIME
AFTER TIME....I need to find someone else to catch rides
with. I wish I could jump in the Honda and ride up there,
but I don't trust my driving well enought to make that
trip.

Anyway, I finished reading that book. It was really good.
It took me longer than expected, but I finally finished it.
It was good and it kinda gave you a life lesson. I don't
want to go into detail about it, but from that book I take
the knowledge to know that you must protect yourself at all
times and like the book said, "RULE ONE: STROKE THE MIND
BEFORE THE BEHIND!" I like that saying....fall in love with
the mind first....then the behind will come! *J*




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