My Heart and Soul....
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2002-12-17 18:39:08 (UTC)

Mixed Signals...

I talked to sara today. I guess Andy talked to her last
night about me. Apparently he thought that I was pissed at
him, and that I was the one who wouldn't talk, or make eye
contact. IDK, but I still hold to the fact that HE was the
one who wouldn't say hello to me when everyone else did.
Then I got thinking about it, and realized that maybe after
he did that when I first got there, I was a little cold
toward him. Mostly because I didn't want to approach him, if
he didn't want to approach me. Wow, cause that's gonna get
us real far, huh?

His friend Beth is still planning on coming up for a week.
BUT, he said that he thinks that after she leaves, things
will be different between he and I. Did I call that one or
not. Now, I don't exactly want to be his second choice, but
color me stupid. I like him a lot, and if I have a shot with
him after the holidays, I think I'll take it. Those that
know me, know how I am about guys. I'm picky. I don't just
go after any radom guy, I only go after ones that I like,
ones that I see a future with. PLUS little miss Sara is
coming up on her 6 monht anniversary. Which basically means
she is ruining everything, because she's totally fucking up
the streak we had with short term relationships. So now I
guess that is my cue to get going, and find someone that I
like. LOL....and No...it's not going to be MacDougall. Char
and Danni think its ammusing to pick on the fact that we
flirt with each other. So what. I flirt with a lot of guys.
Yes, I like him, and he's a great guy...and MAYBE we will
hang out and shit after I get out of basic. BUT...hahahaha,
I don't exactly think we are looking at marriage right now.
hahahahahahaha...unlike certain enlistees who have a thing
for Char. (but then tell me, is there anyone who DOESN'T
have a thing for char?) :- yea......

HAHA...and I found out today that Andy crashed his Buick.
Now, Sara understands the irony of this, because this is the
third guy that has dumped me, and it is the 3rd one to crash
his car. I find that terribly ammusing. See, cause I love
cars, I have a genuine appreciation for them. And when guys
dump me, that Irish witch heritage in my past kicks in, and
bad things tend to happen to those cars. The only thing I
can say, is at least it wasn't his El Camino, cause I did
have a special place in my heart for that car. HAHA...but
still....thats what he gets I guess. LOL....[please relalize
I'm only kidding about the witch thing. I don't wish these
things on the guys, it just happens to them. I'm sorry...I
really am]

And...Gabs--just want you to know that I know EXACTLY what
you are talking aboput with the guys. They were our loves,
and nothing will ever change that, and TRUST me I know what
you are saying when you say how hard it is to see them SOO
ahppy with another girl. I know that is part of my problem
with my ex's. Not so much that I want them back in my life,
just that I hate to see them so happy with someone who isn't
me. Just know that I am always, ALWAYS here for you, and I'm
your best friend, NO MATTER WHO YOU LOVE!! haha....keep
smiling Gabs...we'll find our Cowboys.(well, I'll find my
Cowboy...he MUST have a twin brother that lives in Florida
somewhere, RIGHT?);-)

Love you all!