Welcome to own demise
2002-12-17 03:28:15 (UTC)

in a little locked room

I wish i could just have 2 classes a day.
my first period class is my business class... i love it,
its so easy and i basically get to sit and talk to maya
the whole time and i get good grades.
and then theres homeroom.. i cant stand it. i have to do a
jesus walk to get there on time and i get there sit for
ten mins listenin to this one bitch who i seriously cannot
stand but im not going ot say or do anything to indicate
that. i have my own reasons for not liking her. shes just
so... phony... and at the risk of sounding like the next
fucking holden caufield, i hate phony people. Just like i
hate liars. i have no use for them. i don't lie. only the
people ive been chillin with lately will confirm it as
well. im not saying i alwasy say what i feel or think, bc
im not like that, but ill call it like it is if and/or
when asked. my god i was thinking about it, i was such a
god damned pathelogical liar my freshman year... no wonder
people thought iwas so fucking weird.
anyways, then i have dance. which was at the begining of
the year my least favorite class. but now honestly, its my
favorite. i love it. i love being able to goof around and
have fun and i love stretching. its like my favorite thing
in the world. i love the way i feel when i work out and
then how good i feel afterwards.. its like the ultimate
upper. mayube its bc im on phentermine.... whatever the
reason, im greatful for it.
i called mr. man and his mom said hes gonna call me back
as soon as hes done gettin his hair cut.... let's see if
it happens. i wish i could find out what he thought of
what i wrote.. i dont want to ask him bc thats kind of
awkward and very foward and i cant handle that.
i am really startin to like how i look. ahh! hehe.
ah well im no the horn with annie so hold up.
ok so anyways, ahh i hate this. im constantly stuck
between a rock and a hard place. annie wants to hang out
with me, andi want her to.... but after this whole ordeal
with the shit talkinmg and whatnot my friend dont want to
chill with her, and grr its not cool ya know. everyone
thinks im like "letting her off too easily" like ishould
be pissed at her forever an dkick her ass and talk shit
bout her or something, but io dont want to. and maybe im
nieve and i want to believe that she never did me bogus in
any way, and i want to pretend like everythings always
been fine and everything. i mean idont know i alwasy try
to look for the best in people. even when the bad is
slapping me in the face.