ergot and the ju ju queen
Not quite 24 hours..
Okay.. it hasn't even been 24 hours yet. Since he's gone.
And I miss his company. I've decided to write an entry in
our diary every day, while he's gone.
Partly because it will make me feel better. :) It will
almost be like I'm chatting with him, even though it's
going to be entirely one sided. Hey, at least I get the
last word.. and the first one.. and I can say anything I
want about God or anything.. lol The world is less than
10,000 years old. The I.F. lives on. I'm not brainwashed.
Give to God, Give to God. heheheh Hey don't worry.. all
these things sound awful to me now too. But I do really
still believe in my I.F. :) The rest of the paraphernalia
is falling away from me. I haven't really stopped to think
about that yet. "later.." :)
Oh, the second reason I decided to write every day while
he's away.. is because of my previous deleted entries and
msg's to him. This time I won't delete. I'll write.. not
only for my pleasure, but for his. :) He'll probably get
bored reading all these entries I intend writing while he's
away.. but I would prefer to think he'll enjoy them. :)
I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I
miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss you I miss
you I miss you.. :)
This morning, I logged on just to see if he was still
there. I knew he wouldn't be.. just had to check. And today
at work.. my phone was pathetically quiet. No sms coming in
to brighten my day. And I guess I'm saving heaps of money,
because of not ringing him. lol But.. it's going to be
hard. Missing his voice. :(
This evening we went late night shopping, and I was buying
cards for Father's Day, and a b'day card for David (it's
his 29th b'day tomorrow).. and would you believe I spent
most of my time reading cards that I'd love to send to my
dvl.. :) I'm a sucker for cards. I could stand in a card
shop (my favourite shop is "Cardiology") for hours, just
reading. I have, on occasion, even become teary.. lol I
know.. don't say it.. :)
Well, all I can say is this.. if he's going to be gone for
longer than a week.. I hope it gets easier than this.
Because I can't stop thinking about him. Dammit.. lol
Okay jjq.. think of something else. Anything else...
Close your eyes and think of England..
Oh bloody hell.. that's no good..
May as well lose myself in parties, sex, and the demon
drink.. lol It's a wicked path I'm on.. (cue.. ergot's
Either that.. or go find the ice cubes.. ;)