my life, my love and my happiness?
Ad 0:
2002-12-14 22:37:57 (UTC)

same shit ......

it is so shitty out side. i just got back from the mall
with maria shell and bean. it was so buisy but we had fun.
it took us like an hour just to get out of the parking lot
it fucking sucked but what ever it is all worth it I LOVE
THE MALL!!!!!!! i stayed at marias last night got real
retarded and watched nightmare b/f chrismas the best movie
in the world! and we get up this morning her fucking VCR
ate my tape i wanted to through it through the window
fuking shit what the hell is that? and i was suposed to be
working tonight but they didnt need me, but i need the
money. and maria went to her chritmas party for millers
fun fun !!!
i would be there but i was suposed to work. she is bring
in laura and that is cool b/c then never hang out any more
so... and me and maria practicly live with each other. i
want to move out of this house so bad i hate rules and
shit it just bothers me. im almost 18 and i still have to
let my mother know were i am and it is a pain in my ass!
it is just that much more lieing that i have todo.ughhhhh!
now i am trying to get in the shower but everyone is
getting ready to go out so i gotta wate. i want to go
bording but it needs to stop raining and start
snowing!!!!!!gerr i hate this part of winter all it is si
wating and wating and wating....

seriously why am i so fucked up.i know when i need to stop doing
something but i just refuse to. what is my problem? i hate my life
nothing is ever right in it. it may seem from the out side that my
life is perfict and it is far from. i have mom. who ignors my every
word my evey thoght! she has an ass hole for a b/f who disrsepects
me every day. i miss my dad so much i just want to cry forever!!!!
my sister (the only one that understands everything that comes out
of my mouth) lives over 3'000 miles away and i see her like never! i
love my friends but they just piss me off sometimes i feel bad
saying this but they all do. i really just need someone to love me
and not judge what i do. i just cant seem to find this person. Any
were. i have loved and lost (which i think is a good thing and a bad
thing at the same time)i have loved and not been loved back and i
hate my life!!!!!