The Subway Fantasia
2001-08-30 00:35:49 (UTC)

I am a Samurai

I am a Samurai of the Subway order! I crouch before the
bain glass, eyeing the customers with only the wisest of
pupils in my skull. I make rapid movements, pulling and
replacing knives from the bain cracks... swift, silent,
scary. These customers should realize not to mess with me
in a dark alley, I'll cut them with the smallies and gut
them with the breadies. Yeah, if there was a robbery today
I would deftly leap across this bain glass and stab a
robber in the neck with this green-handled breadie.

Watch as I slice into this foot long wheat bread, smooth,
and QUICKLY! Cut cut cut I go, the customers know I am a
skilled sword(knife)sman now. There is no denying the
downward swipe! Another mission complete, another bread cut
open! SI-YA!

Watch as from my excellent periferal vision, I see the door
to the bread holder slowly swing open. Somebody didn't
carress it closed... the clumsy fools! Watch as I leap from
my place, without missing a beat, tomatos still falling to
the sandwhich below as I shut the door. They don't show it
in their faces, but I KNOW I KNOW in their minds, the
customers have to think I am psychic. Oh yes, they wouldn't
dare meet me in any sort of alley, not even at high noon! I
am a subway samurai! For here or to go? Yes, go far away
from my skills.