The mediocrity that is me
Death to finals
I know, I'm sure you're sick and tired of hearing about
it, but I just can't resist. I have to do another rant
about my roommate.
I cannot stand my roommate.
Before I came to college, I prided myself on my accepting
attitude towards people. I try as hard as I can not to
prejudge people. I try not to hate or dislike people.
After all, everyone has a right to live and have their own
opinions; and as corny as it sounds, that's what makes
However, I am "THIS" close to going absolutely insane.
My roommate is driving me up the fucking wall. I cannot
stand the girl. If break wasn't coming up next week, I
think I would seriously go insane and request a room
change, or look for an apartment, because my mind is ready
to crack simply from having to live with her.
The girl never leaves the room. Never. She doesn't even
go to class, for fuck's sake. And when she is in the
room, she ALWAYS HAS THE FUCKING TELEVISION ON! I have to
say, I HATE television, and I especially hate MTV. That
channel broadcasts some of the worst shit that I have ever
seen. Obviously, my roommate loves it.
The girl is so incredibly lazy. She has never vaccuumed
the room. She never cleans. And while I may not be the
cleanest person around, the food chunks from her revolting
Easy Mac that are stuck inside our microwave are starting
to make me nauseous.
Here's an example of how lazy this girl is: Domino's is
directly across the street from us. It takes
approximately two minutes AT THE MOST to walk from our
dorm room to Domino's to pick up a pizza. So what does my
roommate do? She fucking orders pizza from Dominos and
has them deliver it. Right. That right there, my
friends, is the epitome of lazy.
She listens to/watches/wears/believes whatever is fed to
her via MTV. I think the commercialized bullshit she
listens to is causing me to become a music elitist.
Not to mention that our ideals are about as polar opposite
as you could possibly get. The girl is blantatly racist
and a self-admitted homophobe. I am sorry, but you just
cannot get any worse than knowingly being homophobic, AND
THINKING THAT IS OK.
The emphasis she places on money literally makes me sick.
Never in my life have I met someone so incredibly
selfish. The girl has absolutely no regard for anyone
other than herself. She uses MY cell phone to call up her
mother and literally SCREAM at her, telling her to go out
and buy her a car. A car, for crying out loud.
She judges people like I cannot belive, and seems to be
proud of telling me how fucking "popular" she was in high
school. NEWS FLASH: I DONT GIVE A SHIT WHO YOU HUNG OUT
WITH IN HIGH SCHOOL! The other night she was telling me
about how she and her friends were so "cool" that they
used to say horrible things about others behind their
backs. Like if someone didn't have on the right clothes
or shoes --- she and her friends would be the ones making
fun of them. Yeah, that makes you real cool, you bitch.
Her political beliefs make me want to throw a chair
through a window. Let me just be pefectly clear here: I
have absolutely no problem with people who hold different
political beliefs from me AS LONG AS THEY HAVE A REASON
FOR WHAT THEY BELIEVE. I enjoy a good (key word being
GOOD) debate. This girl is a Republican. I have
absolutely no idea why she's a Republican. Hell, I don't
even think SHE knows why she's a Republican.
One day, she looked at me and said "We should just nuke
the hell out of Iraq and get it over with." Right. Do
you have a reason why? Oh, because they're all
terrorists? Because they aren't a fucking "christian"
nation? Or do you have any idea why the hell you'd want
to wish painful death upon millions of people? No. She
just wants to nuke Iraq because that's what the television
tells her to do.
Her latest remark? "I don't support the ACLU [this being
the American Civil Liberties Union] because they're
racist." EXCUSE ME?! The ACLU is RACIST?! Yeah, that's
such bullshit. The ACLU works to protect the rights of
Americans. They are there for the sole purpose of
protecting the CIVIL LIBERTIES of Americans. You can't
have a statement garunteeing free speech to all, and then
turn around and say "Oh wait, sorry, we don't like what
you have to say, so you can't say it. Too bad."
Jesus Christ on a fucking cracker.
Oh, and to add to the paradox, she tells me today that she
got a 1440 on her SATs. Two nights ago, she looks at me
and says "Dude, I totally did not know that Kuwait was a
country!" She also has no idea who Saddam Hussien is.
What the fuck. Did this girl SLEEP through the Gulf War
or something? And yes, I know she was in the United
States for that, she's a California native, hooray for
She is always eating food in our room. I'm not talking
about the typical dorm room food, like Easy Mac (which is
bad enough) or Ramen. No, she walks down to the Student
Union, and instead of eating there, brings back her
McDonald's to the room so she can eat it there.
Wonderful. I've even told her that the smell of
McDonald's makes me sick. I've told her what is in the
meat (she asked). And yet she still continues to bring
that shit up to our room and eat it there. At times, it
really makes me want to throw up.
I don't want to get into any political discussions with
you. I don't want to hear shit about your religion. I
don't care how popular you were in high school, and how
you used to get drunk every night with your friends in
high school. I don't give a shit about MTV or J-Lo or
Friends. I don't care about the newest clothing line at
Abercrombie. I don't want to hear about how you didn't go
to class again, I really don't give a shit whether or not
you pass. I just want you out of the fucking room for
five minutes, so I can listen to music for five minutes,
uninterrupted. I don't want to let you use my phone,
especially if you're going to use it to bitch and moan at
your mother. I don't want to be "best friends" with you.
And when I leave, or talk to anyone, I sure as hell don't
want you automatically assuming that it's someone it may
not be. While I may not be "Miss Popularity," at least I
do leave the fucking room. At least I have a few friends -
-- and I know they're good friends too.
I really don't care that all your friends were fake in
high school. While you may not believe it, because you're
too absorbed in popular teen culture and trying to be
friends with the "popular" people, my friends are not
fake. Not in the least bit. Believe me, I know it. And
I am DAMN lucky for it too.
Fuck you for being so incredibly lazy. Fuck you for never
leaving the room. Fuck you for your homophobic, racist
comments. Fuck you for your addiction to MTV. Fuck you
for being such a spoiled brat. But most of all, fuck you
for driving me absolutely insane, so crazy that I would be
forced to spend an hour and a half venting for the
millionth time about how crazy you drive me.
The sad thing is, I could probably write pages more.