laviedujour

Diary RSH
2002-12-12 04:28:28 (UTC)

My Heart Hurts

I really don't know how I feel. But to start off Mika told
me her missing piece, I've always suspected something else
to her puzzle, I have yet to tell her mine as for 2 in one
night would have been a lot.

Allan said when he found out about it he mostly had
anger...but I was so mixed up, I didn't know what to
think. I wanted to cry but I could't then. So I left the
computer becuase my sister needed it and I went to my room
to do somw more homework, but insted I cried. Over what
happenned to Mika I did feel anger, I felt so sorry for
her, I felt sad, and my own pains resurfaced. I forget what
was going through my head but I was crying. It was
litteraly like everything around you was moving, like I was
dizzy. Then i stopped crying when I remebered she said that
she was coping with it better these days and for me not to
worry, it was something like that. And I remebered that i
was coping too, that we both are coping, so in conclusion I
beleive that I was crying for the both of us. I'm still
not quite sure what I feel, my heart does hurt, emotions
overload. I don't knwo what to say, and I won't say it
here.

We have so much in common little and big thngs, it makes me
happy thatwe both trust each other the same. so Mika when
you read this let me say one thing...I'll hold your hand
and I know you'll hold mine. Thank you for leting me trust
you, and for having trust in me. Allan and me will always
be here, and I know you know that.I'm gratful that I got to
know both of you, it was truly fate.

Take Care, words want to come out of my mouth..or I should
say..typed into thsi entry..but they aren't yet. Thank you
once again, and to quote the old priest from that
wedding "two poles leaning together are stronger then one
pole by its self"

With Love,
Your friend




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