Life In Munchkin Land
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2002-12-10 21:27:16 (UTC)

I just don't know

I don't get it..what is wrong with me???? why is it me and
him are together its the best day ever but the following
days he ignores me like nothing happened...Why? What am I
suppose to do..I'm oblivious to what is going on inside his
head..He tells me we are just friends with benifits but why
does it feel like more when we are together! WHY! I really
wish someone would tell me...I'm tired of my confusing
interefering with everything else in life! I REALLY DONT
FREAKIN GET IT!!! It really pisses me off. Anyway, besides
all that jazz..life SUCKS! I have a new crush now..Known to
me and jamie as "Wide and Saggy" I'm not even going to
explain it! And I found out today a Sophmore has a crush on
me..How cute..He even asked me out..I told him maybe cuz
he's a really nice person just kinda not that cute..but
looks aren't all that matter right?
I've been writing more poetry lately and I must say I am
improving..I'm very proud of myself..Not to sound concceded
or anything..And My duck in art class is lookin pretty good
to surpisingly..Maybe I should just give up totally on guys
and become a starving artist. Yeah that is what I will do!!
So, I'm still confused but I figure as long as I keep my
arts up I'll be a happy person..I can't wait for music this
year..BUILDING CREW BUDDY!! God..I wish i wasnt such a
worrier..OK nevermind.not going there today...IM GOING
ANTI-BOY for the next few days and being myself before the
other species entered my life..Sometimes..I wish I would
have never moved to mifflinburg because my life changed sooo
much you have no idea..Im very outgoing and not so shy
anymore..But on the other hand I miss lewy..And all my crew
there...and now that im a junior I really miss them even
more..Yeah Im glad i moved here and found a new life..Like
*HIM* but then again..If it werent for *HIM* i wouldnt be
confused and hurt all the time...I wish he would get it
through his thick head IM TIRED OF BEING HURT!! Damnit I
have feelings too..I am a human..Or atleast I think I am..I
just dont know anymore..I cant wait to move to shik..If my
parents ever get the house...I HOPE THEY DO! Cuz it seems I
have better friends over there..Especially Alex and
JJ...Alex is just a sweetheart and JJ is the comedian..And
pretty hott cuz he looks like Jack Osbourne lol...Alex don't
worry your hott too.but You to tall and hurt muh ass! lol jk
i still heart ya buddy! Anyway, Ive been thinking more
about college lately..So far I have my choices narrowed down
to Mansfield and Wentworth they are both good schools i just
hope my grades will allow me to go there..Im hoping when i
go to college my life changes...I can only wish right
now..It's so hard to believe that I only have one more year
of highschool...damn..It doesnt seem possible..Well I guess
I'm gonna go now for fear the computer monster might..AHHH
OMG HERE IT COMES!! haha jk..well im out..lata