Bethiepoo03

yet I will praise

So, something interesting happened the other day. I came to
a realization that 'he' is interested in this other girl in the
group. Now the thing about this is that this girl and I
grew up together, go to the same church and everything.
she's such a nice, sweet, caring girl. I was crushed when
I realized that this was the case, and the even more
distressing thing is that I think that they would make a
really good couple.

I told her that I think that they would make a good couple
and that she shouldn't worry about me if that was anything
that crossed her mind about the whole thing. As soon as I
hung up the phone with her I cried.
I cried for a good part of the day. I lay there on my bed
just helpless, barely able to move, listening to a praise
and worship CD. The song I was listening to was
called 'yet I will praise'. the words are as follows:

“I will praise you Lord my God
even in my loneliness, I will praise you god
I will praise you Lord my god
even in my desperation I will praise you Lord
and I can not forget all that you've allowed
I just can't see the reason
but my life is in your hands
and though I can not see you
I choose to trust you
even when my heart is torn
I will praise you Lord
even when I feel discouraged
I will praise you Lord
even when I'm shattered
and it seems all hope is gone
yet I will trust you Lord my God
Even when I can not see you I will trust you Lord
I will trust you Lord my God
And I can not forget how you hung on the cross
Lord you bled and died for me
And if I had to suffer I know that you’ve been there
And I know that you’re here now
Even when my heart is torn
I will trust you Lord
Even when I feel discouraged
I will trust you Lord
Even when I’m shattered
And It seems all hope is gone
Yet I will praise you Lord”

I wanted to sing the song, but I did not have the strength
to even get the words out. I just lay there and I begged
God to carry me. I told him that I wanted to live my life
for Him, but that I just couldn't do it, and if He wanted
to use me, He was going to have to be the one to do the
work in me. You know what? He did. God carried me.
There is a scripture verse in Philippians 4:6,7 (I got the
scripture reference this time:) "do not be anxious about
anything, but in everything by prayer, petition and with
thanksgiving, present your requests to God, and the peace
that transcends all understanding will guard your hearts
and minds in Christ Jesus." Then there is Philippians
4:13 "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me"
how true it is. I was so encouraged.
I found a new strength.
So many times I have tried to give things up to God. So many times I
have made the decision to lay things down at His feet, but then when
I regain the strength again, I tend to take it right back.
This experience stinks, and there are many possibilities. This may
be absolutely nothing and this may be something serious between the
two of them, but it doesn’t matter. I trust God. It truly doesn’t
make sense that I would feel this way, especially because I am such
an emotional person, but the neat thing about it is that the
scripture doesn’t say “and the logical peace of God” it says “and the
peace of God which TRANSENDS understanding”. And it says that that
peace will guard my heart and mind in Christ Jesus. WOW. What I
need most is to have my heart guarded.
Well, I need to go, but I just wanted to share this
Peace!

beth