nin137

Nick's Journal
2002-12-06 14:51:37 (UTC)

Shopping

so over thanksgiving break i went shopping with my bro.
it was a blast, cos i kinda pointed out how differently
people shop. he's a run down.
Black guys are pretty funny, because the second they walk
into an electronics store they turn into the bill gates of
stereo equipment, or anything hi-tech. within a
millisecond they're on a high tech instrument like a leech
on a dick, pushing buttons, manipulating dials, getting
aggraviated when it doesn't work. of course the employee
is always some white kid that looks like his parents just
crapped him out that morning, and he has to timidly tell
bunny, the 800 lb. 9 ft. tall black guy that he has to
have the stereo plugged in.
Next are the black women. they're always around the
telephones. but moreover, they always scream, it's like
they have tourettes or something. can't you all just keep
it down? just a bit? i mean it's like they took some
benzedrine and decided that they have to scream
everything.
Asians are very amusing too, cos they scurry through the
store like a mouse in a maze. always darting in and out
of video game aisles, munching on some cheese.
The white guy is also funny. He's the dumpy dude that
comes in and wants JUST ONE THING. like this one guy came
in and wanted the elvis presley cd....he was looking under
E and got all pissed off. he was like, "geez, how can this
place not have the king of rock and roll"...so that's when
the suggestion arose of "why dont' you look under P?"
then he gave that weird white guy laugh,
of "huhhuhuhuhuhu, oh yeah," like he took a brick to his
head.
fat women are the best in clothign stores. or makeup
stores for that matter. they always look for the nicest
clothes when they're overlooking the obvious. that polka
dot dress and 8 lbs of make up won't make you shed 5,000
lbs. you're still gonna be a land monstrosity, just with
a new dress and some makeup caked on your face. plus they
always lie about their sizes, which is hilarious when they
rip the shit thrying to get themselves in.
another cool aspect is the lone geek in the store. he's
always obsequiously darting around, and trying to avert
all human contact as this is probably his only time out of
the house.
of course you have the fast food restaurants during black
friday. apparently people didn't get enough food for
thanksgiving so they gourge themselves with this shitty
food. the funniest hting i saw was this really hip guy
eating a steak sub and the molten cheese eat through his
skin as it dripped out. he screamed like a little bitch.