The land of unknown
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2001-08-26 21:34:06 (UTC)

Taking the Death Blow

i got a chance to talk with Kitty last night. i wish i hadn't
have taken it. all my worst case sanerios i told myself,
actually came true. here's a story first.

a man stands in a cold alley. dark clouds loom over
head. yet there is a light that he sees. that shines his
day to no end. it's with in a girl. he walks up to her.

"Hi." he says with a smile.

"Hello." she replies. her beauty stuns him. as he gave
himself the strength to tell her how he feels, just as his
mouth opens, the wind blows him to the cold concrete
floor, hard. as he looks up, she shows interest in
another man. he forces himself to stand up. as they
restore their smiles, the wind blows him down again.
even harder. he sits for a while as he thinks if it's worth
going on. over time he got up again. he looked at her.

"I love u." he said. her smile became a frown as she
turned away. then BAM! the wind hit him like a mallot.
knocking him to the ground harder then both times
before combined. he hits the cold concrete as it begins
to rain. this time he does not move. blood poors from
his mouth. his last sputtered words were. "But ...... i......
*cough*....love.......u.....*cough*." then his body stops all
motion. the black rain baths him in sorrow. as no one
gathers to mourn his death. but the wind only laughs.

this story i came up with as one of my worst case
sanerio. last night was a horrible conversation with
Kitty. i had to read the words i only feared of reading or
"Tom, i'm sorry, but i can't"
that hurt. like 100 bullets. those are the words i never
wanted to hear. but i had to read them. i should have
never gotten online. i don't know where to go from here.
i don't get it. and i don't want to any more. i don't care.
'life it seems, has lost it's glare' as i once put it.