humming bird

my F***ed up head
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2002-12-06 03:15:13 (UTC)

too much

well ok first of all- hank has cancer- it came back
positive and he has to stya in the hospital for like a
month and go thru chemo and yeah all that bullshit and
kyle has been a dick about it lately i wanted to like kill
him- and yeah just i was like really upset about hank
earlier becuz i mean i love that kid and i wanted to maybe
start a relationshpi with him again but like i cant now
becuz of this bullshit and he is so young and he doesnt
deserve it aand they said he has a 90 % chance of beating
it but what about that other 10? and he doesnt deserve to
go thru all of the pain that he is gonna have to go thru- i
dont want him too- and his family doesnt deserve this
either- its not suppose to happen to freinds, not my
friedsn. but yeah so it sux and i was like crying earlier
becuz i man - hes my friend and my ex and the guy that i
know loves me and i want to like go to the hospital and be
with him like all the time and never leave his side-i feel
like i should be there and i know i am barely gonna see
him and i just have so much running thru my head like it
is seriously overwhelming like ok.....
1- hank
2- pat and what do i do-
3- my parents have been on my case alot lately
4- cosmo
5- i want a boyfriend
6- kyle
7- my b-day
8- this time of year sux - alwaysh as and always will
9-school
10- getting my fucking liscnece

do u see??? this is insane - my birhtday is coming up
ina week and if it gets fucked up i am gonna be like
BEYOND pissed you dont even know , and im wondering if
jason is gonna call or not - UGH just fuck it - the only
good part about today was that me and meg and karolina went
around and stole Xmas decorations and it was SO fun and we
like followed this one random car for like 20 minutes- it
was so funny and i stolt hisl ike waist high -light up-
nutcracker looking dude that was out by someones mailbox
and it was so funny cuz it like wouldnt come out of the
ground and it like slipped out of my hands once and then i
grabbed it and hopped in the car and like the cord was
still hanging out the car but other then that my day
was cashed and i am cashed right now so
goodnight
julz


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